Author: Anonymous

So, I am drowning. My husband was out of work for a few months, and I used the credit cards to survive. Now my monthly payments are more than $600 monthly. It is November already, and I want to buy my kids something big to wow them at Christmas. I decided I want bunk beds for them. They love bunk beds, and maybe they will feel safe enough to sleep on their own. So I am pinching and scrimping and saving and hustling. I am currently not regularly working due to an accident that caused some serious injuries. But I am hustling; I am doing craft shows, and I am doing gig work. I am even using an app that lets you get points to buy gift cards. Anything and everything I can think of. I am cutting back and cutting back; I am putting things back in the grocery store, I am telling others it will be a lean Christmas. I am slowly having just enough after bills that I just might, might, be able to pull off these bunk beds.

I am with my husband and both children, running to their swimming lessons when the universe decides my life is going too smoothly and BAM! We get in a car accident, my car is written off, and suddenly we have no car, no way to get my husband to and from work, and no way to get my daughter to preschool. We have no family who can provide a financial safety net; we have no money, and I personally felt no hope. In an instant, when I was able to tread water, the water level was now a foot above my head. What should I do? Well, the first thing I did was tell my family to try to get level-headed, not panicked, advice. Unfortunately, I only had the most basic insurance, so we were getting nothing to help from the insurance to replace the car. Lesson learned there, for sure. I am certain I could have coughed up just a bit more to cover the car better. The money for the bunk beds? Gone, in a tow and getting my husband to work this week. But at least I’m not in the hole yet. 

I embraced the barter system by giving away items for help with my kids, cleaning for my friend, to trade for grocery money. Teaching people new skills in trade for help doing the skills (I was canning food to help the grocery bill and to provide my husband with tasty low-calorie snacks, but that’s another blog post for another time), I talked to my sister-in-law and worked out a deal for her husband to do the labour work to fix our old car that had been stuck in the driveway. And my super secret stash of cash will be enough to pay for most of the parts I need. It will take longer to get family to fix things, but it is worth it to not have to pay $1000 in labour my car to fix. But the amount of time will give me time to find money to pay for the rest of the parts. 

Now, instead of relying only on myself, I am talking to and begging all my family and friends to help me get the bunk beds. One friend has helped; she bought the new sheets I need for the children. I am hoping someone else will buy the pillows, and someone else will help with mattresses. Then that only leaves the bunk beds for me. Sometimes you can’t do it all yourself. Sometimes it’s ok to admit you can’t do it all, and that is a lesson I am still learning. It is important to realize that financial health can weigh as heavily on the mind as physical and emotional health, and the stress of financial health can make physical and emotional health worse. Getting a grip on healthy finances can perk up multiple areas of your life.

I am still trying to pay down the credit cards and only use them if I can pay off at least as much as I spend. Not getting further in debt, not always getting ahead, but at least not getting further behind. While the average credit card interest is 19.99%-25.99%, it is important to pay attention to the different rates that might be on different cards and pay down the highest interest first. You work hard for your money; no point in giving extra to the banks! I am still taking every extra side gig and still trading for as much as I can. The next battle is to continue no matter what, not to let Christmas drag me down and make me further behind, even if that means the dream of the bunk beds has to wait for their birthdays.